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There must be something good to say about a family-effort film project Anyone older will immediately pick up on the amazingly cheesy effects, performancessadly including Tony Curtis', who must have owed somebody a big favorand atrociously bad scripting and dialogue.
However, all this makes for a fabulous riff session, and you won't even need RiffTrax. You'll have plenty of your own material, especially when "Happy" shows upit's this flick's only Clowning achievement.
BandSAboutMovies 17 December You have to love this description: "A young space prince on the run from an evil space villain, stranded on Earth and waiting for his grandfather the king to rescue him, befriends an Earth child named Brian and together they evade robots, bears, and triangles.
I mean, you could be like everyone else watching every Star Wars over and over again, complaining about the stuff that hasn't been fixed since the 's or you could watch a Greydon Clark movie with his two sons in it he shows up as well.
And oh yeah - his wife Jacqueline Cole is in it, too. This is the last film that Greydon Clark would direct. This is the time in my life where I sit back and say, "I have wasted my life by watching so many of these.
I can't even guess as to why or what they did to make this happen. I'm sorry, Mr. Is this the worst role of your career?
Well, you were in Sexette and The Manitou, after all. There are no droids. There are no lightsabres Curtis has what appears to be a crystal envelope opener.
There is no Force. But there is a bear. And you know who saves the kids from that bear? Darby Hinton. Yes, the very same Malibu Express star Darby Hinton.
The man has gone from making sweet love to Sybil Danning to being in a Greydon Clark children's film. Now I'm depressed. Everyone acts in a very weird manner in this film from the way they talk, walk, gestures, are all either fake or self conscious.
How bad can Sci-Fi movies get? Just watch "Stargames" and then ask yourself if you've ever seen one that's worse.
I'd be willing to bet the answer is: No. Having seen it twice I can say that Stargames is an atrocious movie in virtually every aspect: the acting, editing, dialog, special effects, costumes, music, etc, from top to bottom this is as bad as it gets.
And believe it or not Tony Curtis was roped into this horrible mess somehow or another - but at least he's the king in this movie.
Did he need the money THAT badly or was he just bored and needed something to occupy his time with??? Stargames is the epitome of a slipshod, amateur production and as a result the movie comes loaded with many illogical situations, which in no small way is due to the cast and crews sheer incompetence.
And as you watch in stunned silence you'll no doubt be be asking yourself "how much worse can this get? And not to forget "Happy" the clown Who?
You'll see. The film is set around the premise of a young prince who escapes the evil clutches "Lugos", the most pathetic depiction of an intergalactic, power mad, space villain you'll ever see.
Oh yeah, the 12 year-old prince clumsily makes his get-away in his mommies space ship I kid you not and remains on the run from Lugos from there on.
The majority of the movie however takes place out in the woods it's cheaper that way , where Greydon Clarks sons face a variety of obstacles - one of which is diabetes, which sadly is the most menacing enemy in the movie.
Yep, it's that lame. In fact this movie is so lame, that people are able to evade laser beams - by merely stepping aside. So much for light traveling at , miles per second!
The costumes are comically second-rate, especially the goofy looking helmets with the triangular visors and the "laser guns" seen in this movie, are literally nothing more than clear plastic tubing.
With there being so much to criticize, it's hard to say exactly what part of this movie is the worst, but if I had to pin-point it, I'd say it's the script and the dialog that's contained therein; which is loaded to the hilt with ridiculous pseudo-scientific jargon, that was obviously made-up on the spot.
I guess when you yammer on about non-existent technology you can say anything. One things for sure, fans of "Hard Science" will find this movie utterly detestable, because as with most Sci-Fi films even the good ones , physics don't seem to matter.
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